The Story
At one point in my journey, I was working with someone who held real weight in the cosplay community. For a while, things looked promising…we were collaborating, sharing space, and building momentum. But after a brutal falling out, they decided the best way to cope with their own shortcomings was to start speaking badly about me. Online, in person, at cons, in DMs even across multiple communities. To this day, they talk about me like I’m cosplay’s biggest pariah.
You know what’s happened because of it?
I’ve booked more shoots.
I’ve gained more followers.
I have even been invited to speak, shoot, and show up in more places than ever before!
Every so often when I hear they’ve mentioned me again, I smile and think: Thanks for the free promo. Because at the end of the day, they’re just an influencer I don’t have to pay.
The Nature of Haters:
Haters come in different flavors, but they all stink of the same insecurity. Some are quiet saboteurs; vague posting “just asking questions” or passing gossip like it’s community service. Others go nuclear: trying to blacklist you, misquote you, or spin whole conspiracies around your name. Some hide behind fake accounts, others are bold enough to drag you in the open (usually when they think the crowd’s on their side). Of course, let’s not forget the smiling ones…the ones who compliment your work to your face, then gut you in private discord servers and group chats.
It’s cosplay’s own shadow economy of jealousy.
In the cosplay and con scene, it’s even murkier. Because here, people wrap their hate in language like “accountability,” “community values,” or “protecting the scene.” But look closer, and it’s almost always personal. You got the guest spot they didn’t, you booked the photographer they ghosted and you built something they thought they were entitled to. So now they cloak their bitterness in fake concern and try to act like the moral police. But here’s the thing…
They’re not doing it for the culture. They’re doing it because watching you rise makes them feel small.
Why They Hate
At the core of every hater is the same ugly truth: they see in you something they couldn’t pull off themselves. Maybe it’s your confidence. Perhaps it’s your consistency. It may be your ability to ship an idea instead of just talking about it for three years in a Discord server. Whatever it is, you’ve triggered something they’ve been avoiding in their own journey…that burns. It’s easier for them to believe you cheated, lied, lucked out, or “weren’t even that good.” Because if they admit you earned it? Then they must confront the fact that they didn’t. And that’s not a mirror everyone’s ready to look into.
Reframing the Hate:
Here’s the wild part-
Haters do you a favor. Every time they say your name with bitterness, they’re advertising for you. Every snide comment, every whisper campaign, every “warning” they give someone about you… it creates curiosity. It sends people to your page. It plants your name in conversations you didn’t have to buy your way into. That’s marketing, baby. And the best part? You didn’t have to lift a finger (or cut a check). Haters are influencers you don’t have to pay. They amplify your presence while trying to erase it.
That’s not just ironic
It’s useful.
What You Do Instead
While they’re busy running their mouths, you’re busy running your business. You’re shooting with intention. You are building real partnerships. You are showing up early, staying late, and stacking receipts. You’re not out here to win the cosplay drama Olympics. You’re out here to build something that lasts. So while they’re glued to group chats, trying to out-snark each other, you’re booking the next shoot. Editing the next reel. Launching the next product. You’re building momentum they can’t match, because they’re too busy watching you to focus on their own damn craft.
Boundaries vs. Feedback
Now, don’t get it twisted. This isn’t about ignoring everyone who challenges you. Growth will require feedback. You should absolutely listen to people who give you honest, grounded critique with the goal of helping you level up. But there’s a massive difference between feedback and performance. One comes from respect; the other comes from resentment. One is direct and actionable; the other is vague, emotional, and always somehow public. You’re not obligated to entertain every opinion thrown at you, especially when it’s laced in ego. Protect your bandwidth. Build a trusted circle who can tell you the truth without tearing you down.
The Arena Metaphor
There’s a reason you’re taking hits: you’re in the arena. You’re the one swinging, sweating, bleeding, doing. Everyone else? They’re in the stands, throwing popcorn and opinions from a safe distance. It’s easy to criticize when you’re not in the fight. It’s easy to talk big when your own armor’s still in the closet. But in this world we play in; whether it’s cosplay, conventions, content creation, or just lurking. The people who matter are the ones in it. The ones getting back up after flops, the ones learning in public and the ones daring to build something real. The arena isn’t for the perfect; It’s for the brave. And if you’re taking hits? Good. That means you showed up.
So let them talk
Let them tweet, whisper, vent, and stew. Every second they spend focused on you is a second they’re not growing themselves. Meanwhile, you’re too busy making art, making waves, and making moves. You’re not here to impress the insecure. You are here to build something too bold, too loud, and too undeniable to be ignored. Let the haters keep doing their free PR work. Just remember to wave from the main stage when they’re still trying to get a badge. And if you hear them mention your name again? Just smile and say, “Thanks for the exposure.”
Want to turn the hate into heat?
Grab your copy of The Culture Hacker’s Guidebook—the no-BS manual for cosplayers, creatives, and con scene disruptors who are done playing small.
Then dive into the Burn Brighter Protocol—a mindset weapon designed to keep your light sharp, loud, and unshakeable, no matter who’s trying to dim it.
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